Tuesday, December 20, 2011

29 weeks and some minor problems

Its funny, I hate third trimester in case you've not figured this out yet.  But right now I'm sitting here thinking that I'd rather have my old third trimester complaints back after what this past week has given us.

About 10 days ago I commented to my husband that I needed to go to the eye doctor as soon as Isaiah is born because my vision in my right eye was blurring up on and off all day and that eye would twitch too.  I also started to have an increase in frequency and length of dizzy spells, and an on and off headache.  Now, if you know me then you know I am prone to migraines, which are coupled with a visual effect where one eye droops in the socket and twitches, and I run with low blood pressure, low sugar, and am mildly anemic so I also have dizzy spells for a few seconds when I get up or move too quickly.  So I don't typically notice stuff like this unless it is a big change from my normal pattern, and I never think to mention it to medical staff outside of initial medical history because it really ISN'T a symptom for me 99% of the time.

Well, Sunday was that 1% that my normal became my symptom.

I woke up feeling kind of off on Saturday, so I chose to rest and lay around the weekend as much as possible (including during a visit to take the kids to visit Scott's mom Saturday afternoon for a few hours, we were going to go to church afterward but opted not to as I wasn't feeling good).  Sunday brought a headache that would NOT go away without Tylenol (took the edge off it) and I fell asleep for a good 4 hours or so and my family had trouble waking me up.  I took a bath that evening, as I was feeling dizzy to the point that I worried I may fall in a shower, and ended up vomiting in the tub just as I was finishing up my bath because of the dizziness, light reflecting off the water, and the water made the dizziness visually harder to process.  So I did what any responsible pregnant woman would do.  I made a call to the after hours line to talk to the on-call OB in my midwife's practice.  He was a wonderful man by the way, and listened carefully to my description of symptoms and normal and my concerns.  He pretty much agreed that I needed to go up to the hospital to get checked out, which I was getting dressed and planning to go in even without his order.  I didn't feel right, something was wrong.

My blood pressure was high, and labs showed low potassium and a few other things that aren't too great.  However, urine test showed no protein, and my blood pressure wasn't *too* far above the normal range so they let me go home with a couple prescriptions for my reflux (to try and control it better because I'm still throwing up pretty much nonstop) and a potassium supplement.

Fast forward to this morning at 9am when I saw the midwife.  I peed in a cup and while washing my hands got hit with another dizzy spell.  Get back to the exam room and the nurse said I looked paler than when I went in, so she rechecked my blood pressure.  Sure enough, it was 149/91 which isn't *too* terribly high but still high enough for concern in third trimester.  Erica, my midwife, looked over my labs from the hospital and the urine test they did in office, and came in not looking happy at ALL.  I had to do a third blood pressure check, which came in at 125/79, and was told lay down, rest, do as little as possible, take my medication that I was given at the hospital, and if I'm not feeling any better in 2-3 days I am to call her and then go in to labor and delivery for more testing. *sigh*  And yes, my office pee test showed that I am indeed spilling protein into my urine, which is a BAD sign.

She's trying to AVOID diagnosing me with high blood pressure at this point, in case you can't tell.  And as for me, well I'm just trying to keep my blood pressure down in the normal range for most people (we won't aim for MY normal, my normal is in the 90/60 range).  I know all the risks and what we're looking at here as possible problems, and am doing everything I can to avoid that now.

I've already decided that if I end up in the hospital with this pregnancy for blood pressure issues, we're getting my tubes tied.  I'm NOT doing this again, I have now 5 beautiful children to think of first and to have a complicated pregnancy with a 6th child is not something that I feel is worth the risks to my family.  We may have some difficult decisions to make this next few days and weeks, depending on my blood pressure, and I do have to put my children first here.  I would love more children, but honestly if we have to stop then that is fine because if we are meant to have more God will either resolve these issues I'm having now or He will provide us with the means to adopt later.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

random musing

I thought I was expecting a male human baby....... Instead it feels like I have either an alien or an octopus growing in there.  Or, maybe an octopus and an alien mated and then the resulting offspring was implanted in me.  I have a power kicker, he LOVES to move around and make my entire belly shake.  Sometimes it is adorable and fun to watch and feel, but after a bit it starts to become painful for me with every movement.  Ahhh but it is only another 12 weeks or so that I have to deal with this discomfort, and it is a sign that he's got a good strong body.  Yes, that's it.  I need to see the blessing of a healthy baby instead of focusing on the fact that it can be physically painful when he moves around.

and we have a crib!

Yesterday I got a call from a friend of mine.  She had offered her daughter's crib to us several months ago, once she got her little girl into a regular bed.  Well, she was taking apart the crib and had it ready for us to pick up, and a few other things we were welcome to if we wanted them.  So I arranged for us to go over last night, meeting Scott at her apartment, so we could pick the stuff up.  I now have a crib and mattress for Isaiah, and today the girls and I will start getting things ready in my bedroom for Scott to move furniture around to  make room for the crib and baby stuff.  Once we get all that done, Isaiah will have a place to sleep at least.  We just need more clothes and some diapers now, and we'll have all the basics we need for a newborn.  Just a small step, but it is a forward one at least.

Monday, December 12, 2011

dressing a bunch of kids for less

I thought I'd share a few thoughts on this topic.  I know it is one that gets a lot of people scratching their heads, especially if you are looking at a family with several children of one gender.  Clothes aren't cheap, especially if you want good quality.  And when you have four daughters with very different tastes in colors, styles, and even different body shapes, you can quickly go broke trying to work with it all.

If you have ventured into the girls' clothing department, you will see a variety of styles and looks.  Skinny jeans, boot-cut pants, and many others.  Low rise, ultra low rise, classic high rise.  Stretchy and relaxed fits.  And let's not get into sizing.  Along with numbered sizing in the girls' deparment, you have slim, regular, and plus size, with or without adjustable waistbands to make them skinnier if needed and/or desired.  There are so many options it can confuse anyone who doesn't have some idea of what they are doing before they go to the store.  Shirts, skirts, and dresses have the same issue.  Asymmetrical cuts, peasant style tops, spaghetti straps, one shoulder or two, empire waists, baydoll cuts.  Embellishments, silk-screen prints, embroidery.  One can QUICKLY lose themselves in a sea of fashion just walking into the girls' department at any department store.  I should know, I've even become overwhelmed.

Often, fashions in department stores don't even fit our rules for modesty and appropriate attire for the ages of our daughters.  I'm not a fan of skinny jeans and jeggings, especially with the way the local teen girls pour themselves into these pants.  We have a rule that shirts must cover stomachs when both arms are lifted above the girl's head, so that eliminates a good number of styles that are meant to skim the waistband of their jeans.  I also am not a fan of clingier clothing, especially as Missa has started developing a figure at the young age of 8 1/2.  These guidelines are fairly conservative in general, but also liberal at the same time.  I know families who take this further by not allowing tops with lace, designs, or certain necklines (we have rules on the neckline as well, but the girls also know how to layer a camisole under low-cut tops).  We also aren't too big on 2 piece swim suits, but have come to accept that this just isn't possible so we try to stick to tank-style swimwear with the swim skirt bottoms to increase coverage a bit.  Even I wear a tankini with skirt bottom, but I think I have fat thighs and that makes me feel better about how I look in a bikini.

So, how does one find conservative attire for young ladies?  Well, many of the more upscale stores in Columbus have appropriate clothing, or we can purchase some things online.  I have trouble sometimes with finding acceptable stuff in local department stores.  But going to the upscale stores can break our budget with four girls to clothe, even with the increase in quality that usually makes these items more durable and more likely to hold up to the rough and tumble of the girls so that they actually can pass clothes down to younger sisters.  So, our options are limited a bit.  I can either compromise on my general guidelines for how they dress and allow them trashier clothing, or I can shop secondhand at thrift stores.  I choose to go with thrift stores.

My husband works near a VERY large Salvation Army thrift store, and once in a while will go there to get the girls jumpers, dresses, and pants.  Tonight was one of those shopping nights.  He got 5 pairs of jeans, 2 jumpers, a doll, and a lunch bag with thermos (for his lunches) for $26 there tonight.  Our goal was pants for the oldest 2 girls, as Missa has recently had a bit of a figure development spurt and outgrew most of her slim fit jeans in the waist (and torn out her gym pants in a couple of inappropriate places).  Three of those jeans are just for her, and the other two are for Liddy.  One jumper for each of the two, and they now have a bare bones starting wardrobe for winter that I can add to a little at a time.  Liddy has inhereted some jeans that Missa no longer can fit into, so she's pretty much taken care of, but Missa can wear these few items while I pick up a pair of quality jeans every paycheck until we get her enough to really work well.  Granted, the thrift store jeans won't likely last more than a few months before she tears them out in a couple specific spots, but I should be able to replace them in that time with some jeans from Old Navy or Gap easily enough.  And I have enough left over from Scott's shopping trip tonight that I can go to the thrift stores here locally over the weekend to find some shirts for her, and possibly pick up a couple new undergarments that she now needs.

I plan to do the same thing with Isaiah's wardrobe.  I have a few new things, but the bulk of his infant clothing will likely come from thrift stores and other similar sources.  Although, I did manage to get an adorable little 0-3 month size camo zip-up hooded sweatshirt for under $4 brand new.  I am excited about that purchase, and look forward to getting to the thrift store for the rest of his clothes that he'll need.

Tuesday, December 06, 2011

dishonesty and natural consequences

Lately, dishonesty has been a big issue here in my home.  We've had kids sneaking around, getting into craft supplies and food items and using/eating them up without telling us.  Now, I don't restrict these items too much, but I do require that they ask beforehand so that I can at least keep tabs on what we've got available.  Its a practical thing here, we are on a budget and I carefully plan meals and activities for the family.  If something is eaten and I'm not told, then I cannot adapt my menu accordingly.  Same with a craft or activity, if someone takes off with the glitter glue and uses it up without telling me they are using it then I may plan a craft using it and then not have something for them to do during that craft time because I'm missing supplies.  This is just basic common sense I think, yet the girls are having difficulty with remembering this one rule that we have.

It is very rare that I will say no to something, and that is usually because what they want is either out of our normal budget (requiring us to save up for it or specially budget for just enough with no extra, like certain fresh fruits that may be out of season) or it is not an item they need to eat (seriously, who sits and eats a stick of butter or a package of cream cheese or a boxed cake mix? yuck!).  I don't think I'm being unrealistic here, just ask so that I know what you are taking and I can see what's left when you are done.  I do 95% of my discipline for breaking this one rule, and usually in conjunction with lying about it afterward.  The other 5% of discipline is for unkind words and actions, so obviously I'm doing something right if I'm not frequently breaking up fist fights or correcting unkind words.

So back to the taking things without asking first and dishonesty afterward issue.  I am trying to come up with a series of good natural consequences for not asking before they help themselves, and for a series of consequences for when they try to cover it up with lying.  The current offense involves Liddy and a craft kit that I had purchased.  It is just a simple sun catcher painting kit, it has 12 sun catchers that the girls paint and then they can hang up.  I bought this a long time ago and hid it on a shelf, then promptly forgot about it until Scott found it on Sunday while he cleaned up those shelves.  I've had it at least a year and a half I think.  Anyway, I had this great idea for it.  Since we don't have any ornaments for the tree (every year we buy the shatterproof bulbs, and every year the kids manage to break every single one) this year we are doing homemade ornaments.  I thought, in a moment of brilliance, that maybe the girls would like to spend a Saturday with daddy in the kitchen with its wood laminate floor (read: EASY TO CLEAN UP MESSES) painting sun catchers while I am out grocery shopping and running errands this upcoming weekend.  He agreed that it sounded like something he could manage on his own, and that it would be a great way to distract the girls while I leave to go shopping (there's always a fit from at least one kid because she thinks she must go EVERYWHERE with me and she never lets me out of her sight, we are working on this and she's starting to get better about it though).  Well, apparently Liddy decided that she didn't have to wait, so yesterday she snuck into our room, got it out, and started painting one of the sun catchers.  She spilled all the purple paint on her pants and managed to get the teddy bear one she was working on half finished before she heard us and hustled to put the stuff back in the box, not in the spot Scott put it, and ran to hide the sun catcher under her bed.  I discovered the damaged kit this morning when I went to get the box of Christmas cards out to mail off another one to a person who had sent us one.  She first lied about it, and then when I threatened to put the tree up and no Christmas at all she came clean and then went to get the one she had painted and the pants she had spilled paint on to give to me.

Natural consequence for her actions?  Well, since the timing coincides with payday weekend, I can go purchase some paint to replace what she spilled (which I need to buy all colors anyway as those kits don't come with enough paint, nor enough brushes for more than one kid).  So her sisters still get to do the craft without much issue.  However, I'm debating if she should be allowed to participate in the activity with her sisters because she decided that she did not need to wait and went sneaking off to do it herself.  I am giving her an opportunity to show us that she has some self control to earn the ability to do the activity this weekend.  So far, she's not very receptive to this, as it requires her to actually DO her chores instead of whining until one of her sisters does them for her to shut her up.  She is actually quite intelligent and a good planner when it comes to getting out of doing her chores, I'm rather impressed by it at times (but mostly I'm annoyed and she ends up in trouble for it, giving me most of the 5% of discipline that isn't for not asking before they take stuff and lying about it).  We have solved many of our past discipline issues through similar natural consequences methods, including the girls' regularly having a chronic case of disrespect and the gimme's whenever I took them shopping (that stopped after I picked up the little two and my purse and walked straight out of the store with the oldest 2 hanging off me and all 4 screaming bloody murder because I left without buying the treat they were going to get that trip, then followed it up with a few months of not taking them out at all except to doctor appointments and other REQUIRED things with no field trips or shopping trips at all), so I would like to implement a natural consequence method for this case.  I had a child recently eat half a stick of butter (go ahead and gag, I can wait) and as a result, I ran out of butter and had to make their macaroni and cheese without it one day.  The only thing that makes cheapo store-brand generic mac and cheese taste tolerable is the butter in it, so their lunch that day was NOT something they enjoyed and they ate just enough to not starve until dinner that night.  We are slowly making progress on the food-eating aspect of this, but still have a long way to go.

Saturday, December 03, 2011

pregnancy- coming up on 3rd trimester

So, on Monday I will be 27 weeks pregnant.  Technically, this is that border between 2nd and 3rd trimester.  However, the discomforts are starting now.  I am NEVER a happy pregnant woman, and my favorite part of pregnancy quite honestly has always been when I go into labor.  I have an irritable uterus, so I start dilating early and have contractions.  My babies like to sit in a bad position and cause me all kinds of fun pains shooting down my legs and through my hip and backside.  I feel like I'm sitting on a bowling ball pretty much all the time, and it feels like my stomach is going to tear open at any moment.  Yes, I do *not* take kindly to third trimester at all.  I know that there are those who see this time as a blessing, but honestly I see it as something to tolerate until I can have my sweet baby in my arms finally.  Yes, pregnancy is a miracle, I do see that, and it is a special gift, however its not one I particularly enjoy most of the time.

So, if I'm not very good at updating my blog for the next few months, know that it is purely because I'm grumpy and starting to get fed up with the discomforts I get to enjoy for the next 13 weeks or so until I deliver.  I'll try to post about what the kids and I are doing with lessons, and be positive about the pregnancy right now, but really I am not posting much for a while.  After all, if you don't have anything nice to say, you shouldn't say anything at all.  Am I right?

So, here's a happy little blip for the pregnancy.  We have officially purchased baby Isaiah's outfit that he will wear home.  I even have a picture to share.






I still need to add socks and a hat to it, but it is adorable, don't you think?  We are anticipating that he will be around 8 1/2 to 9lbs at birth, so we are completely skipping all newborn sized clothing.  This one we went straight into Carter's size 3 month clothing, I got the outfit on sale for $12 and the little soft crib shoes for $4.  My mom says that she got some socks and newborn mittens that match it, and will send those up with the Christmas gifts this year, so I just need a hat and blanket really to complete the outfit.  I sure hope that ultrasound was right since we now have the official homecoming outfit.  Next I plan to install the car seat this weekend, before I get too big an uncomfortable to do it easily AND before the winter weather starts so that I know we are covered at least (if we don't buy an infant seat between now and birth, that is! Then we'll get the van into the garage and Scott will install it instead for me) and we have some cleaning and rearranging to do in our bedroom to make room for the little guy.

Friday, December 02, 2011

Prayer request for a friend

I don't do this kind of post here, but I'm going to today.  I'm a little behind in reading the blogs I follow, and I feel bad for not keeping up better with some.  Especially the one that I'm about to link with here.  I know I don't have much of a following for this blog, but I fully believe in ripples spreading and hope that this happens a bit here.

A dear fellow homeschooling mom of 6 is expecting baby #7, a little boy.  She's had complications because her sweet boy has Spina Bifida, and as a way of processing she has started a blog to write about her journey through this.  Please keep her family in your prayers, especially for comfort and peace through the times they are facing in the very near future.  Here is a link to her latest post on the blog she's started just for this baby boy and their journey.

http://masonsbjournal.blogspot.com/2011/11/dumb-ob-and-dreaded-hydrocephalus.html

Also, if you can keep my friend Shauna and her little girl, Charlie, in your prayers as they walk through some decisions regarding decisions she has to make about her little girl's care.  I can't imagine how difficult this decision must be for her, and I pray that she can find calm and peace through her own decision-making process as well.

Both of these women inspire me, and I look to them regularly for inspiration when my own struggles start getting me down.  They are incredible women, with a great deal of strength to walk through their lives and the struggles they both face.  I pray for them both daily, and now they need more prayer from others.  Please, take a moment to lift both these lovely ladies up to our Lord for strength, knowledge, healing, comfort, and support in their times of need.