math upgrade time

Missa is giving me difficulties lately. She is using her own personal learning challenges as an excuse to not do ANYTHING. Chores, schoolwork, being nice to her sisters, all of it she is incapable of doing because she has dyslexia. I remember my father going through the same struggles with me growing up when I was older than she is (in case you don't already know, I also am dyslexic). I now understand his frustration and anger toward me whenever I would shut down and refuse to do anything or even try. So, we are proving a point to her now.

Scott gave her a GEM of insight that is just beyond brilliant. He is as tired of her excuses as I am, and dislikes her insistence that she's stupid as much as I do. So, in the middle of her normal whining and complaining that dyslexia makes her stupid he says.....

"Kid, dyslexia doesn't make you stupid; giving up makes you stupid."

Stopped her cold in her tracks. She had no clue how to respond to that one, and just sat there staring at him. I then took that silence as an opportunity to point out how much smarter she is than I was at her age, and how she lets things stop her because she doesn't TRY. I then decided to prove a point to her.

I got out the next level math book I've had waiting for her since the Cincinatti homeschool convention back in tthe Spring and handed it to her. Now, I know she can do the work if she stops and just TRIES, but we bumped her down a level to make sure she had a solid foundation first. She looked at the first lesson pages, and got excited because she knows how to do the work. I then showed her the final test in her test book for this level, and she got nervous and said that she can't do that work. Well guess what kid, by the time you get to that test you will be able to do the work.

She starts Math-U-See Beta tomorrow, just to prove my point. She also has attempted to give up on her chapter book halfway through chapter 3, but I am refusing to let her stop. I told her I don't care if it takes her a year to read it, she WILL finish that book because I know she can do it. I am all about making a point here with her, and right now she needs me to push her like she's never been pushed before. I know it sounds mean to push a child with learning disabilities to do harder work like I am and to be so heartless about it, but I know she's capable. Its all a confidence issue with her.

oh baby!

Not quite sure what to call this one, but its all about the pregnancy.

We had a few rough days early this week. I have a 4 year old with a cold, and my mother-in-law refused to watch any of the kids at all for us so that Scott and I could go to my anatomy scan appointment without the kids. So I spent several hours frantically calling everyone that I thought I'd have a small shot at getting to watch 3 healthy older kids while we took the sick one with us to the appointment. With 14 hours before the appointment, my aunt and cousin (who live a half hour away) came to the rescue and said we could bring the girls over to hang out while we went to my appointment. Disaster #1 averted.

So, forward to scan. Now, I have 2 friends with special needs children, one who is still waiting for her little man to come, so I was just a little anxious at this scan. If you scan through my list of blogs, you will see Miss Charlie's blog and the Our Busy Homeschool blog. These are the two I am referring to. Both families are incredible and inspirational to me, showing me the amazing love that comes with having a special child or having a large family expecting a special child. So, at the scan I was anxious and wanted to see everything. I asked that we look extra closely at the spine, placenta, cord, and a couple extra areas that I know are common for defects. Everything is 100% healthy and normal. So now we know that its a healthy baby, and I have some amazing pictures from it too.



But that isn't the only thing that we found out. We have a healthy baby, but also we learned that our sweet healthy baby is a boy. Yes, that is right, after having four daughters and figuring we'd never have a son, God blessed us with one. All the girls have wanted a little brother, and now they will have one. I still have no clue what I'm going to do with a boy after so long with just girls, but I'm sure we'll figure it out. I was looking forward to early March already because I couldn't wait to meet our newest family member, but now ALL of us are beyond excited about meeting the new little boy joining our family!!!! (I'll not share the money shot to prove its a boy, I have 5 different angles of it because we couldn't believe it).

And to add to our great day, just as I pulled into my aunt's driveway to pick up the girls I got a call saying that my excusal from jury duty was approved, so I didn't have to spend today sitting in a courtroom. I'll have to go in later, but hopefully I'll have healthy kids so I can do it. I don't mind jury duty at all, but I do have issues sometimes with getting a sitter when I have anyone with any kind of runny nose or cough. Hopefully I can get it done before the baby comes so that I'm not forced to ask for an excusal due to having a breastfed infant.

halfway there! and this week's plans

OK double purpose for this post. So stay with me please lol This could get scattered.

On the pregnancy, today is the OFFICIAL halfway point for us. I am 20 weeks today!!!! My ultrasound is Wednesday, and Scott got time off work to be able to come. Now if only I didn't have sick kids, I don't know if his mom will watch them for us now. Its just a cold, but she's paranoid about any kind of illness and refuses to watch them even if we have allergies acting up out of fear that she may get sick. Soooooo it looks like he may be stuck staying home with the kids while I go alone to my ultrasound and appointment unless I can get them up early enough to load up on Dimetapp so it kicks in before we get them to his mom's so she doesn't know they are sick. Yes, I know its sneaky, but I do NOT want to miss having him there for my scan and I have a suspicion they wouldn't allow the kids in too if we have a full round of runny noses and coughing. It also messes me up for jury duty on Thursday, if she won't watch them Wednesday she will refuse Thursday as well just to be safe (even if they are ok by then). *sigh* Yup, this week is going to be interesting for me.

On the homeschool front, we're just plugging away with stuff. I got the big 2 doing math right now, and Jojo is complaining and whining about some electronic toy she wants us to buy while also cuddling up to me. Kimi, she's somewhere around here, most likely playing or making a mess. Since we have sick kids right now, we're just going to do a bit of math and such as they are interested to keep their brains working a little bit. The sickest one of the bunch is Jojo, she's all stuffed up and yucky sounding. Poor kid sounds like Kimi because of how stuffy she is.

In reading, Missa is still plugging away at her chapter book. I do believe she is close to halfway done with it. She's discovered that being sick means that she's stuck laying down resting a lot more, and reading a book helps to pass the time. Yeah, she's going to finish her book I think. I need to make out a request list at the library soon so I can pick up a few more books for her, anyone got suggestions for some good books for her to try out next? We're quite liberal in what we allow them to read, and yesterday they watched part 1 of the last Harry Potter on tv with Scott (told ya we're liberal!). She's not *too* girly typically, and I know she'd really like to read the Harry Potter books but she's just not quite there yet in her ability. Oh, and she hates Magic Treehouse, we've already tried that one (maybe it overwhelmed her at the times we've tried it, but we own a few books in that series and she's never even liked them when I read them out loud to the kids)

Hopefully we can get through this week without too much, I really don't like having sick kids and now I think I'm coming down with it too. Yuck!

reading with Missa

I am dedicating this entire post to my oldest today. She hasn't had an easy time with lessons, and I wanted to just note here how she's progressed over the past few years with her reading.

She started off in K not even knowing her letters by sight, let alone the sounds they make. We got her to at least know the sounds halfway through the year, but it took a half year of public school to get her started trying to read. Their method of doing sight words WORKED with her somehow and she started.

1st grade, she was backed up in phonics with the k12 school into K level because of gaps she had in her reading. She finished K phonics in 1st grade, and moved to phonics 1 for 2nd grade before we withdrew from the virtual academy. It was a smart move for us, and we spent 2nd grade just reading and enjoying books.

Now here we are in 3rd grade. A few weeks ago she decided she is GOING to read the NIV bible she has, and she's slowly and painfully working through it. Then this morning, she was checking out the books on our shelf (I told the oldest 2 girls to get a book each and spend some time reading) and she brought me a CHAPTER BOOK and asked me if she could read it. So, she's sitting in a chair now, slowly reading Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle out loud quietly so she can hear it and see it at the same time. She definitely has moved up in her reading ability I think if she's taking on books like that during her free "ok go read for a bit" time during school. I am now thinking up a reward to give her when she finishes that book, so she has an incentive to actually follow through and finish instead of just giving up. Its her first attempt at reading an entire chapter book, and I don't care how long it takes her but I want her to have something GREAT as a reward. I was thinking maybe going to a movie with me and Scott? I do have free passes to the movie theater at Easton mall, and I'm sure that Scott would be more than willing to get a sitter for the other three so we can take Missa to a movie. Or maybe a special toy? I know she's been wanting a real American Girl doll.

19 weeks and disappointment

I'm 19 weeks, we have 8 days until that big anatomy scan when they can tell us what this baby will be. Yet, for some reason I am really not looking forward to it. I feel just empty over all this right now. Yes it is our fifth baby, but is it really too much to ask that people try to at least FAKE happiness and excitement for us? I'm so tired of being pushed off like its no big deal, its just another baby in my home. Yes I understand that its important and special that the 14 year old granddaughter of Scott's cousin just had her first baby, and I'm happy for her that she has a supportive family who is there to help and that her baby boy will be fine, but when is it MY turn for a little notice? I act like I don't care that people aren't even acknowledging for the fifth time that we're having another blessed addition to our family, but in reality I am devastated by this. Why can't people at least fake it for me?

I'm not asking for the baby shower I never got or the fawning and "worship me NOW" that most pregnant women get that I never really had. I'm just asking that family at least act like they are happy for us. I'm not asking you to buy all the things we gave away as our youngest no longer needed them, or to go buy anything off my baby registry (which I set up as nothing more than a checklist of what we need to buy still). I'm asking that you smile and say congratulations instead of asking me what birth control we're going to use after this one. I'm asking that you not make "no more babies!" comments before we even announced our pregnancy that we had just found out about. I don't want you to buy us a new minivan or a house, or pay our bills for us. I want acceptance, support, and at least fake smiles and excitement.

Is that really too much to ask for? I don't even WANT to go to my ultrasound next week at this point. I feel like Scott and I are totally alone in our happiness for this baby. I know that I've always been alone doing things and I've never had much support in the past, but that doesn't mean that we should be forced to do it alone all the time. We don't ask for help usually, but we have our moments where we NEED it and we almost never turn down an offer for help. Well, now I need support and encouragement from family, and I'm not getting it at all. Thanks, that shows me how you really see my family.

how I get happy attitudes around here

If you have more than one child, you know that sometimes it can be difficult to get your kids to get along and be good helpers and all that. My family is no exception. On a regular basis I am breaking up fights and disciplining children for unkind words, and oh the messes they can make and then refuse to clean up.

So what's a pregnant and exhausted momma to do in such a situation? I pulled a trick out of the book of tricks that my local public school must have read. I first bought a HUGE bag of Tootsie Rolls for rewards, then I set up a reward system for different tasks and behaviors. And this weekend, I'm going to the dollar store to get a crate, some little trinkets, and some poster board so that I can make a treasure chest and chart to earn a dive in the chest.

Now, it sounds like I just stooped to bribing my kids with candy, and that's pretty accurate. BUT, so far today I have a clean kids' bedroom, 4 kids dressed, their breakfast dishes in the sink, the little 2 did their Awana verse practice, and now they are cleaning up the mess they made in the bathroom (including cleaning the toothpaste off the wall that SOMEONE smeared all over it, an entire big tube GONE in one shot). All for the total of 4 tootsie rolls each, and the bathroom (being an extra chore considering what all needs done in there) will earn them each another 4 tootsie rolls. My plan is to take advantage of the Halloween candy that's being sold right now to add some variety to my instant rewards, and upgrade it to a bucket (with a lock on it of course, I'm not stupid).

So how do I handle misbehavior with such a system in place? Well, that's easy. Right now Liddy has decided that she does not want to help with cleaning up the bathroom mess, so when its done she won't get any tootsie rolls. Or, in the case of fighting, the two sisters have to work together on a task (usually something disgusting like cleaning the hamster cage or washing out the insides of trash cans). They also can lose the ability to go to Awana, or to participate in our weekly girls' night (pizzas and a movie, Scott is banished to the bedroom while we take over the living room for this). Last week they all four lost the ability to go to Awana by misbehaving in the grocery store (I had to break up an actual fist fight, that almost NEVER happens here, plus they were all disrespectful to me, one another, and the other customers and ignored my reminders of proper behavior and back-talked me constantly).

And I do everything possible to remain consistent with my ways of doing things. Consistency is more important than anything, if I reward and discourage behaviors the same across the board then they learn what the right actions and attitudes are to have. I'm still working on how to incorporate our reward system into our schooling, which is where the treasure chest comes in. That one will have a daily small reward from the bucket, and a weekly reward from the chest. Hopefully it works well and doesn't backfire on me.

car seat is ready

Yes, I said I got the car seat ready for this baby. LOL As of yesterday, I am 17 weeks pregnant. I'm currently assessing the things we have and are getting these things out and ready so that we can start on the real fun: buying everything ELSE we need. Since we gave the crib and all our baby clothes to a friend's sister, we have literally nothing for basics. I'm hoping I can find the pack n' play for us to use until the tax refund comes and I can buy a crib. Hmmm I think we may *not* have fully thought this through before we decided to have baby #5, it may have been better to wait a few extra months so that I had the tax refund to shop. Eh, we'll figure it out.

So, the first thing we got ready is the most important item of all. We can NOT bring the baby home without a proper car seat. Now, if you know me, you know I'm a safety junkie. I keep up with all the latest safety in regards to car safety and my children. We rear-face until they hit the limits of a seat, then we forward face with a harness until they show the maturity required to sit properly in a booster full time (as long as they meet the legal requirements for a booster as well). Currently, I have 3 in boosters and one in belt only (she passes the 5 step test where she sits, no worries!).

So I decided to get out the convertible seat and get it ready today. Cover: cleaned up. Harness: dropped to bottom slots. Infant insert: found, cleaned up, and put on. Rear facing boot: hunted down, wiped down, attached. Now I just need Scott to put the middle seat for our middle row back in the van so I have a place to install the seat. This baby will be riding in the luxury of a Sunshine Kids Radian80 car seat, which rear faces from 5-33lbs and forward faces from 20-80lbs (yes it IS a harness that goes that high, it does NOT do the booster thing at all!!!!) It has a steel frame inside that plastic shell, and is very plush. It was donated to us when Jojo was a baby by the Kyle David Miller Foundation, and it has 4 years left of the 8 year life span (I had to double check the life span, most seats expire 6 years from date of manufacture but some do go to 8 years). This seat should work just fine and dandy for the baby from birth with the infant insert, if my girls' sizes are any indication of the size this baby will be. I can't wait to get this seat back in use regularly.

And for those whose heads are spinning at my using a convertible instead of an infant seat....... if the baby does NOT fit properly in this seat then I shall wait at the hospital with baby while Scott runs to the store to buy an infant seat to use instead. I have one already picked out, and the local WalMart carries it. But we will not be buying it unless the baby NEEDS a smaller seat, or someone decides to look up my WalMart baby registry and buy some of the stuff for us (I'm using it as a checklist for what we still need to buy for the baby, all our needs plus the goodies we want if we have enough money/time).

God bless the person who discovered peanut butter

I do NOT like peanut butter. I think it has a nasty texture and it tastes bad. So, why am I blessing the person who discovered it? Well, I am sitting here eating it by the spoonful from a jar now, and its one of the few things that is consistently staying down. I hate it but I cannot stop eating it.

I hope this one passes soon, I don't know how long I'll be able to keep up this peanut butter thing......

holy COW that's cooking!

I made a late supper tonight for the kids, and just realized exactly how much food I cooked. It was spaghetti night since I had some hamburger in the fridge that I needed to use up, so Scott got water on for me to boil up a 3lb box of spaghetti and I got out the big skillet and the hamburger.

Now, if you've not figured out by now, I like to cook. I cook in mass quantities sometimes so that I can have a meal for the freezer, or a leftovers lunch the next day. This meal is one of those leftovers lunch meals. I doubled everything so that Scott has lunch tomorrow at work, and so that I can assemble a spaghetti bake and put in the fridge to just toss in the oven tomorrow for lunch. (I learned during my pregnancy with my oldest that cooking any time other than supper makes me throw up, so I like to cook at night and have crazy leftovers for at least one more meal)

Now, the essential kitchen equipment for a bigger family is slightly larger than a typical family's stuff. Most people find a 10" skillet to be perfectly adequate, while I tend to reach first for my 14" chicken fryer (its one of those ones with 2 handles) when I cook. A stock pot for me is larger than many would consider adequate for cooking. When I cook, recipes that serve 4-6 automatically get doubled or even tripled so that I have enough food. "Family size" packaging at stores makes me laugh because I know it takes at least 2 or 3 packages to feed my family. In the freezer section are frozen macaroni and cheese and lasagna entrees that are marked as "party size" and THAT is the right size to feed us all. So, as you can probably guess, I tend to fall back regularly on my experience cooking in a restaurant kitchen, making large quantities of things at once to serve the dinner rush. I don't do small amounts of food normally.

So tonight's supper consisted of the BIG box of spaghetti noodles (3lb size box), 3 jars of sauce, 3lbs hamburger, and handfuls of various seasonings and dried onion. I need to go out there and assemble Scott's lunch for tomorrow and the spaghetti pan for tomorrow's baked lunch. There may even be enough left to make extra lunches for me to toss in the freezer for Scott to grab and take to work when we don't have leftovers.

Next bulk meal I'm hoping for will be a lasagna. That one will be made in 3 pans, so I have 2 for the freezer on top of the one that I'm going to serve that night for supper.

movement *yay*

Yup, we officially have movement here with parasite. I'm 16 weeks today, and I've not called any of it officially feeling the little booger move simply because it wasn't that strong yet. Well, I can no longer deny it, today it made a few very good attempts at kicking my laptop off my stomach. And a couple nights ago, Scott felt a VERY faint movement himself with his hand firmly on my gut at just the right moment before we went to sleep. Its cute now, but in a few weeks it will get annoying. I already know how I'll react to it, and I can't wait for it to be consistently strong enough kicking and moving for the girls to feel themselves as well.

It makes the next 4 weeks and 2 days until my ultrasound feel like an eternity. I can no longer deny it, there really is another one coming. I can feel movement.

Now if only I could stop throwing up...... but on the up side, I'm losing some of the 12lbs I gained in my first trimester, and I *can* zip my regular jeans up again fairly comfortably. Seems that I may be going the wrong way with that one, I'm supposed to be getting bigger (not smaller). Oh well, I'll pop back out soon enough.

I'll have an update this week hopefully on how the girls' lessons are going, we took some time off with the second trimester pregnancy sickness that has occurred (I had almost none during first trimester).

first baby appointment done finally

I finally got to have my first prenatal appointment yesterday. I'm sure you may remember, I was seeing an OB about 45min away before. Well, before we moved here it wasn't too bad, I had to drive a half hour to get to ANY doctor for my prenatal care. Well, then we moved here and I kept my amazing doctor because it was just the yearly exam right? No biggie. Add a pregnancy and it becomes a big deal, monthly appointments that go to every 2 weeks and then every week makes for a lot of time loading kids, driving, unloading kids, and all that just to see the doctor for 10min or so. So, I got a midwife locally instead, and yesterday was my first appointment with her.

I had to take all 4 girls with me. That's the downside to the local midwife, when I was making that drive out to the OB I wasn't too far from Scott's mom so she'd take the girls while I was at my appointments. Now, I'm not going to drive a half hour to take them to her, then back home to the practice 5min from my house and then go back to get them afterward. That's more gas than staying with the other practice would have used. It makes more sense for me to just pack them along with me, and arrange for her to take them overnight once in a while for certain appointments (like my next one, which I'm getting to).

So, they drew blood (Liddy had to sit on my lap so that I had a cuddle object while the vampire sucked 6 tubes from me) and they weighed me (their scale LIES!!!!!!) and then they asked me for a full history and all sorts of odd questions (ummm yes my husband IS supportive of this baby, he just has to work which is why he wasn't there or watching our kids, bills don't pay themselves you know). The kids watched Signing Time on my laptop while I got all this done..

Enter midwife, and I get to hear a heartbeat. 158 beats a minute, fast little bugger. It ain't looking good for Scott and his hopes that this time he gets a son..... lol I really like her a lot, she's not the one that a few people I know see but I'm very comfortable with her.

My next appointment is October 19th, I'll be about 19 1/2 weeks along and we'll have the anatomy scan and hopefully determine gender at that time too. I sure hope this next 5 weeks passes quickly, I'm really looking forward to this appointment.

God always provides to His faithful ones

So, I'm sure you have figured out by now that my family isn't exactly wealthy. In fact, we are probably the opposite of how I was brought up in this area. When we have extra money, we must spend it wisely and usually do so by stocking up on things that we need like extra food and household supplies (toilet paper, dish and laundry soap, shower soaps, stuff like that). We make it work somehow.

So, I did some calculations not too long ago based on the homeschool materials I have here currently, and realized that I may be lucky to make it to our tax refund with the stuff we have currently. I have curriculum I love, but in some subjects it is too expensive to buy whenever we need it. Those subjects I purchase with the tax refund, attempting to estimate how many levels we'll need in math (for example!) or if our history and science will be enough for a year and what supplemental materials to buy.

Well, I can tell you that I likely miscalculated math. Liddy is close to moving up a level in math to Beta, as are Missa and Kimi (they will likely by Christmas). Which that's no big deal, I have the next level already purchased for all 3 children. However, the rate Liddy goes in math I'll need the level AFTER what I've purchased by my birthday in February most likely. That is where the issue lies. Same in history, we're at a good groove in our program and supplements but I can see us finishing by my birthday, putting me in a position where I'll need to purchase the next core level. So what is a girl to do in a situation like this?

Well first, I take it to prayer. I don't do ANYTHING major without praying first until I know what to do. I still didn't know what to do really, but hey it'll work out. That's about all I knew.

Now enter Scott's old babysitter. She would watch him when he was younger than our children, and she homeschooled her 3 kids. The youngest just recently graduated from homeschool in fact, and she decided to clean off the homeschool shelves. She decided to offer to us first, and said that anything we can't use to pass to someone else who can. I got 6 levels of Math-U-See, starting with the very next level in line from where my current collection leaves off, and a lot of books for history, science, grammar, and other subjects. So now, I have solved the issue of what to do, as I have several years' worth of resources and materials that I can just grab and use, supplementing with the library as needed once I get the 2 teacher sets for the math that aren't here.

I think I need to send Scott over to Home Depot for another shelf and brackets for the shelves in our bedroom where I store all the homeschooling books that aren't currently in use...... almost all of this stuff is totally usable to us, with the exception of a couple items that I know right now we won't be using (like Apologia science). I can't wait until later tonight when I can really get deep into this box and log each book into my library spreadsheet and organize and start skimming books to see what will work when and how to best utilize materials.

Just another example of God providing for us when we come to Him in need. He has many times provided things as we needed for our family, by providing extra overtime for my husband at work or leading others to bless us with things that we may need (as in this case, a bunch of homeschool books) or by simply putting us in the right place at the right moment to find something we need (like a much-needed book at a thrift store, or a $1 clearance rack at Target or WalMart for clothing for one of the kids). And sometimes, God smacks us back to reality by reminding us that we do not need what we think we do, that what we have will work for us well enough.

~Blessed are all who fear the Lord, who walk in his ways. You will eat the fruit of your labor; blessings and prosperity will be yours.~ Psalm 128:1-2 (NIV)

~Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.~ Hebrews 4:16 (NIV)

God will always provide what we need when we truly need it, and sometimes before we need it. But we have to have the confidence and knowledge to approach Him with our needs, otherwise He cannot provide if we do not ask.

When is the last time you approached the throne in prayer and asked Him to bless you with the things you need? No matter how small that need may be (perhaps gas to get to the store or a box of pasta for supper that night), when did you ask Him to provide for you in your time of need? When you truly need something, God will NEVER look the other way. He loves us, and wants us to come to Him with our wants and needs just as we as parents want our children to do with us. Give God the chance, and He will bless you beyond anything you could have ever imagined.

4 years ago yesterday.....

Four years ago yesterday was a holiday. It was Labor Day. It was also 3 days past my due date with my fourth child, and I woke up at about 6am in early labor. She was the only of mine to make it to her due date before being born. She was an unexpected blessing, and it had taken me the first 6 months of my pregnancy to stop being angry at Scott for tossing the condom aside that day. (how's that for TMI mom?) Well, 4 years ago yesterday I fell in love all over again, and we had to FIGHT to time with our baby girl.



An now, here we are with a 4 year old again.......



Happy birthday Pickle...... you are already VERY good at being 4.

seriously? PINK?????

Scott is getting even with me I think. The last two nights, I've refused to take the pain so I stole his pillows and used to prop my back and stomach in bed while I sleep. I don't have any pain when I wake up, but apparently his neck hurts from no pillows.

So he bought me a body pillow today.

He bought a PINK eff'ing body pillow. Like, I've had a lovely $60 pregnancy support pillow picked out at Amazon (with free shipping too!) for a few weeks now that he said I could get. Well, its payday, and I was looking forward to ordering that support pillow this weekend. Instead, he went to WalMart and got me a $10 cheapo body pillow and he had to choose the pink one.

I hate pink. I may be a female, but pink is NOT a color that I feel looks good on anything but bubblegum and flowers. And he got me a PINK pillow.......

I will find the humor in it later, but now I have to get back to Jordan's 4th birthday. But before I go, here's a picture for you to see what I'm looking like at 13 1/2 weeks pregnant.



Yup, I'm going to be HUGE again this time. And no it isn't quadruplets. Yes, we're sure.

need some guidance here for a health/science study

So I had a moment this morning. I was just getting out of the shower, I barely had the towel in my hands even, when Kimi and Liddy came into the bathroom. (sometimes I really do NOT like having only one bathroom, this was one of those moments at first) Now, these two kids are my inquisitive ones who make complex connections quickly on a regular basis. I'm regularly surprised by the things they say, think, figure out, and do.

Their question when they came into the bathroom was one that I was NOT prepared for, however. "Mom, we want to know how the baby is going to come out of your tummy." Oh my....... I'm dripping and trying to cover the important parts with a too-small towel thanks to my stomach growing (I show early and then gain a lot during pregnancy, I'm hoping to stick under 50lbs this time) and now I get to figure out how to answer THAT to a 5yr old and 7yr old. I told them I needed a bit to think about how to answer that because it is a little complicated, and they skipped off to let me think.

An hour later now, I still have NO IDEA how to answer that and they've asked me about it already a couple more times. Anyone got suggestions for me on how to explain that to them (we've not had the talk yet about how the baby actually got there, they are starting with the end and working backwards for information) without scarring them for life? We've already talked about the things a newborn needs and what they can and can't do, looked at pictures of them as newborns, and stuff like that. So, now we're talking about the baby growing in there and then coming out. Suggestions?

they never cease to amaze me

My sweet little Kimi and I have been working on writing her numbers for math mostly, and counting to 20. Well, it looks like now I need to teach the kid to skip count by 10's and then 5's because she can count to 109 with help at each ten's change. CRUD! I'm not ready for her to be moving this fast...... and I'm thinking that Primer may now officially be beneath her level, she's also memorizing some of her facts just from playing with the math blocks with her sisters (they are all playing with them lately to help them memorize which color is what number).

pregnancy- week 12

I have officially hit the 12 week point, as of yesterday, in my pregnancy. I can now start to relax a bit about it. However, by now I've usually had one or two appointments with my OB/GYN. I've still not had my first appointment due to money issues, but we're getting that fixed now.

I woke up this morning to the sound of my two sweet oldest girls fighting quite loudly. Yesterday I caught them playing in my front yard without even mentioning that they were going outside at all, which doesn't EVER fly with me. As a result, they got the lovely task of "go clean that black hole you call your bedroom and don't come out until it is finished!" for this disobedience. They are more than welcome to play outdoors, but they must ask first and are required to stay out back unless they ask special permission (which is only granted if an adult is able and willing to sit out front since we live on a busy main road). Its the same rule we've had since my oldest was old enough to go down a slide on her own, and it hasn't changed even with moving to a new city and house three years ago. Rules are rules, and I will punish those who break them.

So yes, they got to clean their room, and they took all day until Scott got home and still didn't finish it. So he fed them and sent them to bed after getting on them about it himself, and I gave them hugs and then told them that if their room wasn't finished the next morning before I woke up they would have warmed butts. (I did mention that i have NO patience when I'm pregnant right?) Yeah, they decided to get into a screaming match at 6:30am and it woke me up.

I tried to lay in bed and ignore it, until I heard one spout off, "oh don't worry about cleaning our room. Mom won't do anything, and she's probably already forgotten about it by now." That got me up and I warmed butts for not doing their task I assigned yesterday. 4 hours later, they finally decided to do it and had it finished for me to OK Missa running the sweeper in there. I got my point across....... now let's hope this time it sticks.

But when i had to get up this morning so early from the fighting, I stood up and had this horrible sharp pain in my lower stomach. It felt like i pulled a muscle, so I scrunched right up immediately and stayed for a minute before slowly straightening myself up again and rubbing my stomach to loosen it up. Ahhhh the aches have begun.

I also canceled my appointment with my OB/GYN for next week, and requested the release form to transfer records to another practice. See, I live about 5 minutes from an acceptable hospital, but my practice delivers at an amazing hospital in Westerville (northern Columbus if you aren't familiar with this area). With my being due March 5th, as soon as I found out my due date I started feeling uneasy about the distance to my doctor's practice and to the delivering hospital. I have had to reschedule my first appointment as well, due to financial reasons. So, I spent a lot of time praying about this and trying to figure out why I felt uneasy, and then decided to transfer to a practice with a midwife that delivers locally. Well, when I looked up the number this afternoon at the hospital's web site, I discovered that this practice has three CNM's instead of just the one I knew about. I got the call made, appointment is scheduled with the midwife, and I just need to get my proof of pregnancy mailed in for my insurance coverage and then the form for records transfer to the new practice. Amazingly, despite not particularly caring for the local hospital, I feel completely at peace with the decision. It isn't St. Ann's Hospital, but I'm sure that they can take care of everything just fine with my delivery. Now I just need to find a sitter for the girls for my 2pm appointment the 7th, I really don't want to take them when I'm going to my first appointment at a new practice and not knowing what exactly to expect. Eh, I'm sure I'll find someone.....

I love Math-U-See

So I posted over the weekend how I'm starting to feel better and was starting officially this week. I really need to learn to not say that kind of stuff, because I now feel like crud again. I'm so tired that I can barely stay awake, pregnancy sickness is starting to make an appearance again, and I'm sore everywhere. Its just that awkward stage for me now. Poor Scott ended up sleeping on the sofa last night because I went to bed before the kids did and I locked the bedroom door, when he was ready for bed he couldn't get me to wake up to unlock the door for him.

But anyway, my love for Math-U-See........ As you may know, we switched in the middle of last school year for the kids. Well, this week with me feeling so tired and unable to do much of anything has pretty much meant that we're just doing basics. For us, basics means they read to me and write stuff as they want to. At least, that's what it meant to me in the past. Now, they can do their math fairly independently as well when I'm not able to spend the time teaching them. Math-U-See has a dvd instruction video for each level that teaches the lessons, and the worksheets ALWAYS follow the same format for practicing the material so there is no guessing. This week, Missa has done an entire lesson on her own pretty much, and will do the test tomorrow or Friday. Liddy is halfway through a lesson herself, and tomorrow Kimi and I will be watching the DVD lesson she's on together (I love my laptop).

Because of our choice in curriculum for math, even days that I'm not really able to be much use beyond the most basic of tasks aren't a total wash academically. If I'm not up to actually teaching, I still have that fallback of them reading to me and being able to do their math fairly independently. I know this isn't exactly how the program was intended to be used with lower elementary students, but it is working beautifully for our family right now when life is upside down because mom and dad got this crazy idea to have another child.

energy bursts, new homeschool year, and stuff like that

Well, I've hit that point where I am starting to feel less tired. If you read my last post, I'm having some trouble with this pregnancy feeling real to me. I've not had much in the way of symptoms really this time around, and almost NO sickness. The main clues I have, besides my beautiful ultrasound, are tiredness and crampy/achy feelings in my stomach and abdomen as things start stretching and moving around to make room for the baby. OK, I've been hormonal and moody lately too, picking fights with Scott and being harder than usual on the kids. I've said things to the family that I wouldn't normally, and I'm using obscene language more around the kids than what I'd ever do typically. I am having issues with a short temper lately, and saying a lot of unkind things.

So anyway, this week I've noticed an increase in my energy level. It started with a few minutes of playing with the kids instead of just laying around supervising them (I get REAL tired at the start of a pregnancy apparently) and has moved up to where I was able to take a child with me out on a 2 hour grocery shopping trip this morning. So obviously, I'm not needing as much rest as I was even a week ago. It is now that I'm realizing exactly how many symptoms I was having earlier even though I wasn't too terribly sick.

So, now this is starting to feel real to me since I've figured out my major symptom. I now am starting to feel the anticipation. And, I'm beginning to take advantage of the energy that I'm starting to get back. We've put off starting the new homeschool year because of my lack of energy, and now I'm thinking I can do this on Monday. I don't have *all* my supplies really for this, but I've got enough to last for now. I have most of our books, and although I cannot make the switch in history that I wanted to originally (since we did so little history last year I wanted to pick up a couple books and switch from the 2 year program to the 1 year program for world history) I feel like we can totally pull off this whole thing.

I have a few weeks of basic consumable supplies for projects at least, but Scott has worked a lot of extra overtime this last 2 weeks so I will have the money hopefully to go out next weekend and finish off my supply shopping on top of a good restocking of groceries. This paycheck was a bit tight thanks to renewing tags and a driver's license, the mortgage payment, and having to get the drain guys out here to run the auger through our sewage line for the year. That took every bit we had, to where we had to ask Scott's mom for a small loan to get us through this second week of the pay period. I just needed a few more basic groceries, and Scott needed gas for the week so he can make the commute to work. We're good now though, thanks to her. Good supportive family is so important when it comes to the success of our family, and knowing that I can call her when it gets tight or I need a sitter in a pinch has been vital for the success of our family. She watches the kids for my prenatal appointments, watched them for several days/nights when Scott had his surgery, and even took them overnight a few months ago when Scott took me to the homeschool convention in Cincinnati. She will also keep the girls when we have the baby, hopefully we can convince her to come stay here in our house during that time instead of taking the kids all to her tiny 1 bedroom apartment for that 2-4 days. It may just save her sanity to have the extra space (the girls' bedroom is bigger than her apartment, plus the actual yard and toys that we've got to keep them occupied).

I'm really hoping that the fact that I'm starting to feel more energy and less cranky means that my house will start getting cleaned up and that I'll be more able to get things going again around here. Last homeschool year was so filled with interruptions that we have a LOT of math catch-up to do this year. I can't afford to be too far behind at all this year, Missa and Liddy both need to finish Alpha and Beta this school year in math and Kimi needs to finish Primer and start Alpha. Yes, that is more than a year and a half of math in one school year. All 3 girls are about 1/4 to 1/3 through the current levels in math. Last year we made huge strides in reading, so this year the plan is to go heavy on math and get that caught up to a degree. I hope I can pull off my plan for this subject.

Also, next weekend I hope to have pictures to post of the indoor garden that we are starting. I plan to send Scott out to purchase the materials needed to build the platform, and then hopefully we can get hold of one of those hard plastic wading pools still to use for our garden plot. If not, the plan is for him to build a box from wood and line it in pool plastic before filling it with soil. Then we wait for the seedlings we've started to get big enough to transplant successfully. The tallest one is an adorable little 3" tall cucumber plant. I am really looking forward to being able to post an update and pictures of our big science project that I'm doing this year with the girls.

is it real?

I still am having trouble here with believing that we're expecting baby #5. I've had almost NO pregnancy sickness except for a week or two where I just felt horrible, and really there hasn't been anything to indicate that I'm pregnant happen. Yes, I am tired and I have some round ligament pains, but other than that I'm having no issues really. Scratch that, I've turned mean according to Scott and the kids. I've been picking fights with Scott lately, but he is such a good man he just forgets about it once I get done with my fighting and doesn't say a word.

So I decided that since I hit 10 weeks yesterday, putting me at 25% done with this pregnancy (give or take, as I'll likely deliver sometime the week before my due date), it was time to dig stuff out that I've been storing. The first thing I dug out was my boxes of cloth diapers.

Yes, I use those old-fashioned things. For over a year I used them on 3 kids at once while Missa was being too stubborn and not developmentally ready to learn to use the toilet instead of her pants. And, there are a LOT of options available for diapers now. Some are just as easy as changing a disposable, but you wash them instead of throwing them away. I have some of those; however, I prefer the good old fashioned pinned prefold with a cover over it. And yes, even the prefolds and flatfold diapers (those big squares of cloth you do origami to so they fit the baby) are better quality than they used to be back when we were children. In fact, here's my sweet Kimi modeling one of my diapers at 1 1/2 years old.



That is just a simple bleached infant prefold pinned, she was (and still is!) very small for her age so she never made it into premiums or toddlers before we quit using cloth at the end of my pregnancy with Jojo. I love them, and am planning to use them again this time.

So, I dug out boxes. Now I know I'm missing at least 1 or 2 boxes here of diapers, because I'm not seeing some that I clearly remember that are NOT cheap diapers. I had some very desirable fitteds and pockets with the girls that I was VERY proud of having, and they aren't in the boxes I got out today. However, with what I did find today I discovered that minus pins and a few covers, I don't need to buy ANYTHING to start from birth once the Pampers St. Ann's Hospital gives us runs out. Not too bad huh.........

But even with digging out the diapers, noting where my baby swing is at, and finding the pack n' play, this still doesn't feel real to me yet. I've had an ultrasound already, and I heard the sweet little heartbeat, but still it just isn't quite real to me. I sure hope that changes soon, because it feels odd to know that another baby is coming but its not sinking in really.